Nick Brown tells us about his Doctor Who Series 3 climax theory – it’s all in the anagrams, apparently…
Russell T Davies.
Say what you like about him â€“ and a lot of us do â€“ but the man is a genius.
“Eh?” I hear you cry. Yes, I know some say that heâ€™s not as good a writer as people like Steven Moffat (but, letâ€™s face it, not many are), but, letâ€™s not forget, heâ€™s the man behind the Doctor Who revival. Heâ€™s turned it from pantomime to drama. Heâ€™s turned it into the BBCâ€™s award winning flag-ship programme. And not only that, but he manages to weave a story ark into each series that, if weâ€™re honest, not many of us can second guess. Who worked out that Rose was the Bad Wolf, then? Come on, hands upâ€¦
No, I thought not.
But this series, this series, he has excelled himself. We know heâ€™s got a liking for winding us up with his acronyms (Yana â€“ You Are Not Alone) and anagrams (Mister Saxon â€“ Master no. six), but I think Iâ€™ve cracked it this time and, oh yes siree, it is the work of genius!
Right then, you ready? Then cop some of thisâ€¦
It all starts at the beginning of the series. â€˜Martha Jonesâ€™ is an anagram of â€˜John, a Masterâ€™ pointing forward to John Simm playing the evil Time Lord. And how did we see him re-introduced? With the fob watch. Now, both David Tennant and Russell have said on Confidential that the Face of Boeâ€™s story isnâ€™t finished yet and it might surprise us. Well, how about this, then? Re-arrange â€˜Face of Boeâ€™ and you get â€˜Ace fob foeâ€™. Yes, somehow the Face of Boe will turn out to be the Master!
So, the next thing we know, the Master has got back to Earth and is now Mister Saxon (anagram of Master no. six). He now has a wife called Lucy by his side. He also has funny little metal sphere things called Toclafane. â€˜Toclafaneâ€™ is an anagram of â€˜a fat cloneâ€™. And which race do we know are fat clones? The Sontarans. To back this up, re-arrange the letters of â€˜Harold and Lucy Saxonâ€™ and you get â€˜Lynx hounds a carloadâ€™. Lynx, as we know, was the Sontaran in the Jon Pertwee story â€˜The Time Warriorâ€™. And, cleverly, â€˜Harold and Lucy Saxonâ€™ is also an anagram of â€˜Unholy x-road scandal.â€™ Put those two together and we get Lynx, carload and crossroads. So, somehow the Sontarans will carjack someone at a crossroads.
Next up is â€˜Captain Jack Harknessâ€™. Change the letters around and we get â€˜thank carjack pansiesâ€™. So it seems that Jack will thwart the Sontaransâ€™ carjacking at the crossroads and all will be saved.
â€˜End of season teaserâ€™, incidentally, becomes â€˜see seed of Sontaranâ€™.
So there you have it. Proof that the teasers and anagrams in Dr Who have gone mad!
Even Russell himself is at it. Mix up â€˜Russell T Daviesâ€™ and you get â€˜Lusterless divaâ€™.
(Sorry about that one, Russell, I love you really, you are a heroâ€¦!)
So then, for the climax of series three expect Sontarans, carjacking and the Doctor realising that there was something about that big old face he didnâ€™t trustâ€¦
Canâ€™t wait for season four of â€˜hotrod cowâ€™, â€˜crowd hootâ€™ or, if you prefer, â€˜Doctor Whoâ€™â€¦